It's amazing to me what things affect life changes for us as self aware individuals, us Homo sapiens. For me this summer has flown by! I am starting a new blog a little over a year after starting my first real blog because it doesn't really speak to me anymore and I need to find a different way to express myself. I have new friends (and wonderful ones!) and have been trying to process all my feeling about the prospect of having true friends. My house is finally coming together and turning into a home after nearly a year! And, oh yeah, I'm pregnant! That onslaught of items that have changed in the past 6 months is only a preview of what I have been thinking about and processing lately. It's September 25th, I have been 28 for 2 full days now and I am not sure why I don't feel any different, but at the same time feel like a whole new person!
The "new person" feeling isn't because I'm 28 but possibly has something to do with the babee that's doing gymnastics in my tummy right now. I would also say that a good portion of it is from the living foods journey I have been on in the past year. Another aspect is this wonderful woman that I met about a month ago now at the Raw Spirit Festival. The amazing thing about LM is that she's female and I talk to her every single day. Females and I don't usually click like that (well unless I'm not being my authentic self - i.e. keeping my mouth shut).
I've learned a lot about myself in the last year and I have been incredibly introspective lately about the whole thing. I used to look for people to connect with like it was something I couldn't live without. But I was never able to maintain the connections and a lot of the time it ended badly. Possibly because I live by my own set of rules or maybe because I just was so out of tune with me? If I were to guess, I would say it was a little of both. In the last year however, I have found myself (well I'm still finding pieces, the puzzle isn't quite together). I am not the outgoing, party animal I always tried to make myself be. That probably explains the incidents that happened when I decided to "let loose" and be a party animal. I don't need to be surrounded by people all the time, which came as quite a shock...and I am capable of being quiet and listen (also a shock). I'm a home body for all intensive purposes. I'm still not 100% sure what that means though? I just know that's what I am.
I'm not really sure where I am going with this. LM and I were having a discussion about taking care of yourself first so you were able to take care of others and it got my brain going all sorts of funny places. I have a feeling I will be writing more today, mostly because I need to write and I am no good at journaling. I find peace in writing, but for whatever reasons have never found a notebook to write in that makes me as comfortable as writing on the computer. I have had many many journals...but they are all only about half way full! Maybe that has something to do with my ability to follow through with things?
Anyway, I will leave it at that for now!
Love & Light,
Wysteria
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